Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Bitesize fiction. Rupture II

I crush the cassette in my sweaty palm, hearing the plastic bending, but stopping before cracking it. "So... it's over. You're gone and I never did anything to stop you. If anything, I just pushed you into it, little by little, until you just leaped into the abyss yourself."

My head probably hurts from crying, but the only feeling I can still perceive is the burning hole in my chest and the sickening feeling in my stomach. "You idiot! Why? Why..." I don't even know anymore. The world is trying to spin the other way around and all my words have run dry.

"Come back? I promise to help you, we'll get over this together. We will talk about it like adults, figure out a solution, so you can restore your sanity and be happy. If only we'd have given it a try when we still had the time..."


"I don't even know how the hours and days have passed by. I vaguely remember crying my eyes dry and attending your funeral. I remember your friends and family in black, I remember them glancing at me, whispering among themselves. I know they blame me. I blame myself too, but there is nothing I can do now.

I'm sitting here in front of your grave. Are you there, under that pile of soil? Are you here, an unseen ghost? Can you hear me calling out to you?
I'm sorry! I wish I might have opened my eyes and seen your suffering. I wish I could have returned your feelings."

On your grave, I set down a withering red rose and the bullet you've shot through your heart. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry I can't follow you over there. I would only break your heart again. So... sweet dreams."


  1. Let me explain... This piece is a counterpart to Rupture
    The first part was from the perspective a person who committed suicide because of unrequited love (to put it bluntly). It is mostly "auditive" (except for the smile) and an addressed monologue, so I imagined it would be a farewell message recorded on the cassette.
    The second part is the answer, from the perspective of the loved person.
    Notice the "dreams" motif... I hope you enjoy them both.

  2. Excellent piece of writing from you Lavi. Quite moving too. Very poignant and sad.

  3. Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

  4. Well written... mingling over from Carol's fabulous party!! High Heeled Life

  5. I read this when you posted it, but had difficulty commenting at the time. A tragic piece, very well captured.


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