I have been writing. I have been. Only I can't publish any of it, because the present is still here and hasn't yet gone to the past. And there are things too personal to talk about with anyone. I can't.
Sometimes music hurts me. Most of the time I waste time making time get stuck between running and staying. In my mind there is a perpetual twilight, filled with shadows of the past and of the future.
Why? It's a stupid selfish question, but it keeps running through my mind. Why is this happening to me? I used to have such beautiful dreams and hopes for my future. I've tried so hard to be the perfect person, to justify my claim for happiness.
But it keeps getting postponed. And the things that come instead are painful.
I guess maybe in the end I don't deserve to be selfish. Not even a little bit.
Dark musings 💝 I hope the twilight changes to dawn 💕
ReplyDeletePerhaps there’s no need to be perfect.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
ReplyDeleteI don't know, if perfect doesn't cut it, what more can I do?
Just be. Perfect or not. Accept the imperfections, I guess that’s what I mean.
ReplyDeleteYes, you are right, there are some things we can't change and we probably shouldn't, because they make us who we are. But I'll always strive to better myself at least in some ways.
DeleteOh yes, strive to better oneself is different to aiming for perfection.
ReplyDelete